DepressionOur clients often present with a feeling of low self-worth and hopelessness. Or they feel a lack of zest and energy, as though something is missing and not quite right.

Some are surprised to discover that low self-esteem is part of the problem – because they are effective, powerful people in so many arenas, like their work lives, or in their roles as parents. Low self-esteem relates to the inner child, who long ago was wounded in some way that it is hard for the adult consciousness to think about, deal with or even know about.

If you are depressed, it is likely that your inner child is angry about a past hurt, but that socially or in the family such feelings were disallowed in some way, so the anger has turned inwards. The cure for this is a supported process of recognising what happened to you, mourning it and honouring old feelings that are triggered by current events – like feeling abandoned, for example.

Depressed people have unconsciously internalised certain beliefs about themselves from early circumstances. These are erroneous messages like, “I am not good enough” arising, for example, out of a situation where there was adversity in the family and the child felt abandoned.

At the core is a primary experience of hurt, shame and loneliness/isolation. This is more common than you might think – in fact, it is widespread.

Depressed people often have an external locus of control – that is, they look to other people to affirm, assist and rescue them. The solution for this is personal empowerment, which kicks you out of the victim position.

If you are depressed, it may be manifesting in a kind of rebellion in which you are passive-aggressive, blaming or periodically raging. Sound familiar?

The good news is that the sooner you start owning this, the sooner you can get free from the further pain it causes you.


Or take our free quiz to find out how you feel about yourself right now.